When you find yourself in a crack-den of a hotel room in Terre Haute, IN, alone and drinking, its best to just acknowledge the circumstances you've ended up in and not purchase bottled beer like some kind of aristocratic asshole. Instead, pick up some 24oz. cans of an American macro-brew and do what you need to do.
I would have purchased a 12 pack of Pabst Blue Ribbon and used the box as a new hat.
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