"AMERICA OR BURST"

Contemporary, American poetry is very much like the 80s smash-hit, sitcom Perfect Strangers. By this, I mean that, currently, the poetic landscape of the United States resembles a suburban man by the name of Larry Appleton moving into a Chicago apartment with a zany immigrant by the name of Balki Bartokomous who is from the fictional Mediterranean island-nation of Mypos. If you were ever in doubt about this analogy, just watch the below video and believe:

The Heart Is A Lonely Hunter, Vol. 2

William Harvey discovered the circulatory system in 1616.

"It must therefore be concluded,” he wrote, “that the blood in the animal body moves around in a circle continuously, and that the actions or function of the heart is to accomplish this by pumping. This is the only reason for the motion and beat of the heart.”

After his discovery his own medical practice rapidly fell off due to the fact that potential patients thought he was crazy.

3/29

Tonight Joshua and John C. took me out for a super terrific birthday dinner! It was kind of like this painting by Il Tintoretto, except everyone was naked and not just the woman/man/woman on the right.

"Finish all your subjects?"

Jeffboy tried to pull this trick on me once; it worked pretty well, especially once I informed him that, yes, I did finish all my subjects:

CLEAN PART READING SERIES

Jeff Alessandrelli and Trey Moody just updated their Clean Part Reading Series blog. Good times with Christian Hawkey and Michael Earl Craig appear to be on the horizon in Lincoln, NE!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!

Today is fellow SKC contributor Jeff Ale's Sand's birthday--who would have though it, he's already 18! Here you go, Jut:

OPPORTUNITY KNOCKS!

When something seems "To Good To Be True," that most likely means you're extremely lucky and you should jump at the opportunity to take advantage of an awesome chance to strike it rich, etc. Take, for instance, the below email (cut-and-pasted in its entirety) that I received moments ago; I'm not going to look this Gift-Horse in the mouth, as the saying goes:

Confidence Trust and Honest
From the desk of Mr.Philip Kabore
Bill and exchange manager
African Development Bank (A.D.B)
Ouagadougou Burkina Faso

Dear friend,

My name is Mr.Philip Kabore am working with African development bank (A.D.B) ouagadougou burkina Faso as the director of Auditing and account Department I discovered existing dormant account for 5 years. When I discovered that there had been neither continuation nor withdrawals from this account for this long period and our banking laws stipulates that any unserviceable account for more than 5 years will go into the bank revenue as an unclaimed fund.

I have made personal inquiries about the depositor and his next of kin but sadly, the depositor and his next of kin died on their way to Senegal for business tycoon, and he left no body behind for this claim I only made this investigation just to be double sure of this fact and since I have been unsuccessful in locating the relatives, I seek your concern for further information.

Amount to claim US $25.200.000.00
Now my questions are:

1. Can you handle this project? ……………
2. Can I give you this trust? ………………

If yes, call me and send to me your personal information as below:

Your name :....................
Your address:..................
Your country:..................
Your occupation:...............
Your age:......................
Telephone number:..............

This information is necessary,

Upon the receipt of your reply,I will give you the full details on how the business will be executed and also note that you will have 40% of the above mentioned sum as your own share while 50% will be for me, and the other 10% will be for the expenses that may arise in this transaction. I am expecting your urgent response to enable me inform you on how the business will be executed. Please keep this proposal as a top secret and delete if you are not interested,

I expect you're urgent response and call, if you can handle this project,

Thanks.

Mr.Philip Kabore
Telephone:+226 74 45 16 24

Don't miss out on this deal of a lifetime! Mr. Kabore certainly knows his shit!

Lorine Niedecker

Sometimes you cruise around the internet, lurking surreptitiously on message boards and chat-rooms. Other times, you feel compelled to read little poems. I like little poems, so, obviously, I like Lorine Niedecker. Here's a miniature gem:

My Friend Tree

My friend tree

I sawed you down

but I must attend

an older friend

the sun

In addition to the link above, you can read more miniature gems here, or purchase an entire collection of miniature gems here.

Black Mountain 2?

This is interesting, via John Gallaher's blog. Any thoughts?

"I rarely believe something strongly enough to state it as a principle, but I do this, that the line of cities with Denver at the center and with Ft. Collins to the north and Colorado Springs to the south will, in the future, be talked about in the way that we talk about Black Mountain."

FILE UNDER: SELF-PROMOTION

Homage to Homage to Homage to Creeley cover image (click for bigness).

More Spring Breakout 2011

Last night, I headed over to Wynkoop Brewery in downtown Denver to meet up with some pals and a few chums; it was a swell to less-than-swell affair. Of course, I was able to indulge in one of my favorite beers of all-time: Patty's Chile Beer. I shit you not, this fine ale tastes like liquefied chili peppers. While the thought of a peppery beverage may sound unappealing to some, the beer really is scrumptious. The Wynkoop site provides the following specifications:

A light German-style beer made with Anaheim chiles and smoked Ancho peppers. A 2006 Great American Beer Festival Bronze Medal Winner in the Fruit and Vegetable Beer category and a Wynkoop specialty. ABV 4.2%.

On Tuesday, I also purchased the new, self-titled James Blake album. While James Blake was released digitally a month-or-so ago, I wanted to wait until the physical release to buy it. Most every cut is fantastic and will give you that special feeling in your trousers that informs you that you made the right decision by picking this album up. You know what I'm talking about.

The Anxiety of Influence

If I could time travel back to middle school, I'd model my game after this guy:

Days Just Wave Goodbye

Kim Gordon didn’t start playing music until she was 28. Willem de Kooning didn’t have his first one man show until he was 43. In a series of 1500 copies, Wally Stevens published his first collection, Harmonium, when he was 44. After only a hundred copies initially sold it was remaindered and some copies were pulped. Patti Smith didn’t start playing music until she was 28. Burroughs didn’t publish his first novel until he was 39. Called “pretty much the high point of experimental fiction in this country” by David Foster Wallace, David Markson’s novel Wittgenstein’s Mistress was rejected 54 times before finally accepted for publication.

Guitar lesson #1

Thanks to these gentlemen, I've perfected my Candlebox during Spring Breakout 2011. Watch out, world.

This is for you, JW

Saget: Legendary Minstrel

Its no secret that I'm a huge Full House fan. I mean, who woldn't be? The show had everything a kid could want in a Friday night sitcom: John Stamos, John Stamos, and more John Stamos. Of course, in the post-FH world, Saget has really stepped up his game and proven to more than a side-kick to his well-quaffed co-star. For an example, check out this rocking tune Saget drops during this live performance:

But In The End The Fab 5 Won Johnny America

The '91-'92 Duke team went on to make $225.4 million in the NBA. The '91-'92 Michigan team earned $431.4 million.

Marilyn M.'s Literature

...revealed last week that Whitman, one of the most influential American poets, had "fascinated" Monroe. "In these very personal texts we come across James Joyce, who she discovered aged 26, performing extracts from Molly's famous soliloquy. She also admired Samuel Beckett, who was in his first flush of success when she was a regular at the Actors Studio after her arrival in New York. More surprising still is her fascination with Walt Whitman, the founder of modern American poetry," he said.

She had a vast library, which included works by George Bernard Shaw, Tennessee Williams, Ernest Hemingway, D H Lawrence, F Scott Fitzgerald and John Steinbeck, as well as Joyce, which she took with her whenever she moved house, something she did many times over her short lifetime. Her copy of Ulysses fetched $9,200 (£5,800) at an auction of her possessions by Christie's in 1999. While in Hollywood, she briefly took evening courses in art appreciation and literature at UCLA before withdrawing after her presence proved too distracting for the other students.


Monroe's favorite colors: Beige, Black, White
Monroe's favorite beverage: Dom Perignon 1953

SPRING BREAKOUT 2001: UPDATE!

While I've been on Spring Breakout 2011 in Denver, CO, my fellow Shawn Kemp Carwash cohorts have been, apparently, battling to the death in Trey's (aka "Tomlinson's") backyard in Lincoln, NE. Jeff (aka "Witten") seems to have the upper-hand.

Persona Poem Exercise #1

Who would Shawn Kemp predict to win the 2011 NCAA Men's Tournament?

Hammy would approve!!!

Last night, arguably the inauguration of Spring Breakout 2011, I had the pleasure of viewing Cedar Rapids. While the comedy has its share of flat attempts at humor, I agree with Ebert's review that this film is wise to create comedy via character development. For a movie such as this, too reliant at times on homophobia for laughter, we do get a somewhat full sense of each character--their motivations, their secrets, their qualities, and their flaws. This is especially true for Tim Lippe (played by The Office's Ed Helms), who works for BrownStar Insurance in tiny Brown Star, WI. Lippe, who's never left his hometown, is sent to the annual ASMI convention in relatively huge Cedar Rapids, IA, where he meets nice guy Ronald Wilkes (Isiah Whitlock Jr.), Omaha resident John Ostrowski-Fox (Anne Heche), and social deviant Dean Ziegler (John C. Reilly), whom Lippe is instructed from his boss to be sure to avoid. From there, the plot unfolds as Lippe and his convention friends share good laughs and stick up for one another. The result is a feel-good movie that you'll probably never watch again, but I'll give it a hearty 4 out of 5 jalapeños partly due to its making-fun-of-the-midwest appeal.

Spring Breakout 2011

In preparation for Spring Breakout 2011, I'm going to learn how to swim; I'm a bit nervous, but also optimistic after watching this video. I mean, it looks pretty easy, I just need to acquire a similar bathing suit so as to be properly attired:

More Radiant Signal: Juliana Leslie

Yesterday, I finished up my first reading of Juliana Leslie's More Radiant Signal, which Letter Machine Editions recently released. This collection, for my money, is the most compelling book from this relatively new press (although, all their collections so far have been solid). I'll probably write a more proper review of More Radiant in the future, but, before I do, I'd like to tout this book as a "must buy," if nothing else. One of my favorite selections, which can also be found in its entirety at Web Conjunctions, is "Softer More Radiant Signal." Specifically, the lines in the poem that state: "tell me we need more / of what happens to bodies when bodies decide / to say what they want more of / More love in the vernacular / for example / More words like / longing, appetite, hunger." To my mind, this poem articulates the books central concern: the intersection of the corporeal and the semiotic. Far from a series of post-structural, disembodied signifiers, the poems within interrogate the complex relationship between the word and the flesh, the flesh and the word.

The Kemp-Hitler Paradox

Hitler had blue eyes—does this present an answer of sorts for all the myriad of atrocities he committed or instead pose a question? And if the latter scenario is the case, which one? Furthermore, what would Shawn Kemp think during his Seattle Supersonicing high flying Reign Man days? His overweight and half-sullen bench warming Cleveland Cavalier days?

R.I.P Nate Dogg

SKC MANIFESTO

Shawn Kemp Carwash dedicates itself to both Shawn Kemp and Car Washes, as well as the aesthetics, ethics, and production of all-things peripherally related to either Shawn Kemp or Car Washes. More specifically, we adhere to the following doctrines:

SKC MASTHEAD

Jeff Alessandrelli: Jeff Alessandrelli lives in Lincoln, NE with his dog Beckett. A lifelong Sacramento Kings fan, he misses the glory days of Garry St. Jean, Olden Polynice, Duane Causewell and Walt Williams. Marks.

Trey Moody: Born in San Antonio, TX, thus growing up in "Mister Robinson's Neighborhood," Trey Moody is an enthusiast of any NBA reference from the 1990s. Other interests include cats and dogs.

Joshua Ware: In addition to Shawn Kemp and Car Washes, Joshua Ware also enjoys unicorns, 5-second violations, and Phil Hubbard.